I’m concerned about the rise of Jewish extremism in my neighborhood. If a black group gets together to defend their needs, that’s considered okay. But, if a white group dares assemble, that’s considered to be racist. Why the double standard? Well this group is a Jewish group that got away with religious intolerance so far. I wonder how much farther they will get.
MOISHE: Jewish Power! (raising his fist in the air)
ME: What are you doing?
MOISHE: Well, you know how the Ku Klux Klan burns a cross on people’s lawns when they are harassing them?
ME: Unfortunately I am aware of this antiquated practice.
MOISHE: Well, we are a Jewish group, so we burn a Star of David on someone’s lawn when we are harassing them.
ME: Why are you harassing these poor people?
MOISHE: You see, a Jewish guy just got married to a shiksa (non-Jewish lady) and moved into our neighborhood. We are outraged, and protesting!
ME: Oh, I see. That type of marriage is worse than murder.
MOISHE: To us, yes!
ME: Can’t she convert?
MOISHE: We wouldn’t consider it to be a sincere conversion under these circumstances. The marriage is cursed, and their descendants will be cursed for generations.
ME: Well, I’m offended.
MOISHE: You’re offended because we are committing a hate crime on someone’s lawn?
ME: No, I’m offended because you forgot to say “abrucha” (a blessing) on the Magen David (Star of David)
MOISHE: No, we didn’t. Hey Pinchas, did you say the blessing?
PINCHAS: No, I thought you did. Maybe next time we do this we should do the blessing together.
ME: Interesting. So, by the way, what is the name of your group?
MOISHE: Who us? We’re the Jew Klux Klan!
PINCHAS: Jewish Power! Jewish Power!