I always dream about having my own dictatorship. I have neither the money, nor the skill to create or run such a place. Maybe I need to visit Arabia and befriend a bored Sheikh who wants to be my partner. But, then it would be THEIR dictatorship which would ruin all the fun. They would get to say, “Off with his head”, but I wouldn’t… damn-it… Not to mention Islamic law which prohibits Cabernet Sauvignon which is another deal breaker. Hmmm.
But, what about starting a country without GPS coordinates. That solves more problems than you think. Most countries have to own and occupy land. You have to either buy it, inherit it, or steal it. Land doesn’t come cheap these days. The only way to get cheap land is to have a boat and hope that Atlantis resurfaces after 12,000 years under water. Think positively — it could happen. The only realistic way to get land these days is to spend a few million or billion and buy it in the Caribbean, or South Pacific.
The next consideration is securing your land. If you have a country, you need a population, assets, and a way to protect that population and those assets. You need a military. You have to have military equipment, soldiers, training, and someone to lead the forces. Hmm, that is not exactly my forte. I would prefer to be a music critic.
Having a country that doesn’t exist solves all of these problems with one fell swoop. No land means no financial expenditure to purchase the land, and no military expenses either to secure the land. It is like a Seinfeldian dream — a country with no land! Of course with global warming and ocean levels rising, it might become a reality for Bangladesh and Louisiana.
I had this joke about the Mediterranean rising to the point where Israel was 90% under water. They had so many people that they had to build really tall buildings on the land, and the rest of the population had to live in boats on the water. So, they created a floating partition wall to separate the Jews from the Palestinians. The Jews yelled, “The water belongs to Israel!”, while the Palestinians yelled back, “No, the water belongs to Palestine!” The irony is that during the night, the partition and the boats all floated into Egyptian waters. After a long night of Debke dancing, a Palestinian boat drifted on the far side of the floating wall to the Israeli side of the wall and they got into a big argument which was settled by the Egyptian military who said, “No, you are both wrong — THIS water belongs to Egypt!”
But, getting back to the point here — a country without land would be inexpensive and fun. You could have imaginary currency, create your own passport for “Wahoogistan”, and even create your own flag! Have fun getting your passport stamped, and don’t give up your US citizenship either. The problem is getting your nation recognized. What other country wants to recognize a nobody of a country? What would you use for currency? And who would protect you if you were invaded. You need allies. For small time fries, starting your own country is not realistic, but if you ran a huge corporation, the corporation would have the funds to create a country. A corporation and a country are very similar in nature. They both have people, assets, and are a legal entity that has income and pays bills. Think about it…
Tweets:
(1) I want to have my own dictatorship, but without land for my country?
(2) I have neither the money, nor the skill to be a quality dictator. “Off with his head!”
(3) What about starting a country without GPS coordinates?
(4) If you started your own country, what would you use for currency?
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