Category Archives: Success

It is interesting to see how women function in the workplace. Women who do jobs requiring force like being in law enforcement tend to validate the expression that “a woman can do anything a man can do just as well, or better!” Unfortunately, in law enforcement, women tend to do the hostility part just as well or better than men can do it. Women often feel insecure in particular roles which society may feel do not suit their nature. Women in law offices feel they have to prove themselves, and then reprove themselves and are in an endless cycle of having to continuously prove themselves as others don’t always take them seriously. So, what is the solution?

First of all, women do much better in business than as Attorneys or in Law Enforcement simply because the prejudices against them don’t exist as strongly in the business world. Second, women are better than men at particular types of tasks and situations such as being non-threatening, and maintaining relationships. So, let’s see how a woman can optimize her chances in the business world.

(1) Let the men handle the conflicts while you concentrate on other things!
Women are seen as non-threatening. Is this good or bad? In my opinion, if you are trying to smooth over a situation, you need someone non-threatening. But, if you have to assert your authority, a non-assertive man gets more respect in the real world for being an authority than an assertive woman. It makes no sense, but this is a proven fact. So, if you are a woman and you need to lay down the law, you can always hire a man to do the job. He can lay down the law in a neutral tone of voice and people will listen.

(2) Forget about seeking validation
People’s prejudices get in the way. How they see a woman entrepreneur may never be evenhanded. So, forget about trying to gain people’s approval. Focus on building your business the right way and not on what people think.

(3) Focus on relationships
When men are younger, they have an easier time being friendly and maintaining relationships. I remember in school that I always had a huge social circle. But, as an adult my social circle fell apart and I had no way to grow it. My housemate is a woman, and I found that I made more friends through her than on my own. Many men find that they make friends either at work, at church, or through their wife. I don’t have a wife, but my spiritual group and housemate filled the void for a while. The point I’m trying to make here is that women do a better job at creating and nurturing relationships than men do as adults over twenty-five. So, instead of worrying about what people think of you as a woman entrepreneur, focus on what you are genetically superior at — building relationships. As a business owner, your success depends on creating and maintaining nurturing relationships. Yes, they need to be profitable, but even a non-profitable positive relationship can turn into a seed for endless referrals and good will. So, recognize your assets and milk them! Let the men handle authoritarian roles while you build relationships.

(4) The 30 something and 50 something female breakdown syndrome.
Femanists have conditioned society to think that women are identical to men in almost all ways. But, this is not at all true. Women do well in the workplace at certain stages of their life. But, in their mid thirties, many women I know have experienced a mid-life crisis. They lose their urge to succeed and work hard. Many want a family, but failed to build a relationship with a steady man and hence don’t have a marriage. Other women have children by this time and need to tend to their children. Then, twenty years after this breakdown there is menopause which is another serious female issue that leads to emotional instability. As a woman, you need to plan for children, emotional instability and breakdowns. But, how? Realize that in your 20’s you are full of energy. Realize that you need to create your business in such a way that you can take more time off in your thirties. Additionally, try to have other people who are reliable take over your customer service role when you reach menopause because you will lose a lot of your best business relationships if you get nasty with them! I’m just being realistic.

(5) Controlling your destiny is good
In a male dominated world, women may not have as much opportunity to move up. Men often prefer to hire men as middle and higher level managers. As a man who works alone, I don’t know how easy or hard it is for a woman, but I can imagine that in many circumstances there could be artificial roadblocks to your success. Having your own business eliminates these roadblocks. You start at the top, and build your clientele and network below you. By being an entrepreneur, you create your own blocks (or unblocks) to success rather than letting some male chauvanist do it for you! Interestingly enough, many Palestinian guys choose entrepreneurship for the same reason. They see working for a boss as constrictive and oppresive and they want to control their own destiny and give themselves a chance to get rich. Many work 80 hours a week, save up, and buy small markets or gas stations and build their empire brick by brick.

(6) Get more nitty gritty
Women can often be tempted to want to live the dream, rather than getting involved with smaller aspects of the business. There is a lot of analytics and nitty gritty tasks in business. You will not do well in business unless you learn to embrace more technical aspects like calculating profit margins, accounting, calculating opportunity costs, assessing the value of doing particular tasks, and more. Women tend to be more people oriented then number oriented. But, to do well in business, you need to be good at both even if you are always better at the people side of the business (without even trying.) As a warning, I would suggest against relying on outsourced staff that you hire for analytical work. They can easily pull the wool over your eyes and deceive you if you are not completely in control every step of the way and if you don’t understand the equations they are working with.

(7) Being in control
As mothers, women understand they need to be in control of their toddler. The minute you take your eye off them is the same minute they try to swallow something poisonous or jump off the porch only to await a ten foot fall into the bushes. Business is similar to babysitting. Most people you hire are not going to be smart or reliable. The minute you stop watching them or lose absolute control over them, you are finished. As a business person, you need to always be in control. I will not say that women are better or worse than men at being in control, but Chinese women excel at watching every move their assistants make which is why women are more powerful in China than in many other countries. If you are not in absolute control and able to simultaneously watch everyone who is working for you — you are through. So, think of it as glorified babysitting.

Ambitious girls who hope to get ahead in business are often advised to take a particular path: Get a degree from the most prestigious college possible, and then get an MBA from a selective business school Finally, get a job from a higher level consulting firm or investment bank. From there it will be easier to be into the more prestigious positions and gain more influence and responsibility.

In real life, there is a very limited supply of big jobs. There are not that many large corporations out there and not that many three million per year CEO jobs out there either. Sure, it’s great if you can get one, but you will be competing against millions of others with exactly the same goal which puts you in a compromising position.

Surprisingly, most of the ladies running Fortune 500 companies did not hopt on the fast track right away. Many took modest jobs from the companies that they currently run — they simply worked their way up the ladder. Starting out in the mail room or as a customer support representative or intern might be the best way to get ahead. That way your skills and work ethic will be known to others in higher positions which is something a college degree just can’t convey.

Another interesting fact is that many of the women who are now CEOs have been working for the same company for decades. They did not job hop. As someone who runs a small business, I see how most people who work for me either slack off, quit, or argue a lot. It is virtually impossible for someone working for me to rise to a higher position in my micro-company unless they learn the ropes over the years and gain my good graces. If there were just one person who would just be steady and hard working for me, they would earn $100,000 per year, and that is without a college degree. They don’t even need to be that talented. I trust people who stick around and deliver consistent results, not some flashy newcomer with a fancy resume. I personally am a CEO of my micro-company. I only have a handful of people working for me. However, I average $150,000 per year just because I stick with it and try to master all of the skills that I need to. My education is nothing impressive as I have only a college degree in Chinese language and literature and no formal business training. Yes, the weekend classes in feng-shui helped me too — but, in mystical ways. It is no surprise to me that the women who got ahead stayed with the same company for years — like a marriage. Steady is definitely the way to get ahead in my book. But, try explaining that to millenials.

It takes longer for a woman to rise to the top in corporate America. For what reason I can’t say. But, the vast majority of them were promoted as long-term insiders while less than half of the men got to the top the same way.

Ambition is a fundamental difference between men and women. Women in their 20’s tend to be more patient with the idea of being at the bottom and working hard for an unappreciative boss while men are in a breakneck race to get ahead. I remember when I was in my 20’s. My male impatience hurt me more than anything else. I made rash decisions which were unwise as I look back into time. But, when women enter their mid-thirties, they often go through a midlife crisis. They lose their drive while men are just getting going. And then when women hit their mid-fifties menopause hits in and they lose even more focus and drive. I have seen this happen to so many women. As a youngster, I bought into all of the feminist ideology — I had no choice as I grew up in liberal Massachusetts. But, as an adult, I see how male biology and psychology is significantly different from women and that they are not our equals. They are no lesser than us, just designed for a different purpose — one that feminists will never accept in their quest to erase their femininity and become imitation men. Feminists are sexists as they don’t accept or respect the role that God game them as women — but, don’t tell them that I said that otherwise they’ll get upset and come after me!

Lastly, the women at the top rarely graduated from prestigious schools. They simply proved themselves in an evolving career path that led to the top. It doesn’t surprise me as my own personal career path as a man was not benefitted at all by anything I learned in school. Everything that I know that is valuable I learned from hard work, experience, and learning new things on the job over extended periods of time. Mastery doesn’t come overnight, and neither does being a CEO unless you start your own company and can be CEO on day 1 (which is what I did.)

I will agree with Mr. Trump on this and many other issues. Yes, you are spending time and neurons thinking. You spend the same time thinking small that you think big, so why not think big? But, this phrase reminded me of my earlier years. I thought that lower paying jobs demanded less hard work. After I graduated from college, I realized that I had to work really hard just to pay my most basic bills let alone having any savings. I saw people smarter than me (and a few dumber than me) in higher paying jobs where they didn’t have to work hard at all. The secret in the job market is to have skills that others do not have. Then you are not so easily replaceable. That buys you time. The other secret is that there are some jobs where they want you not to apply yourself. You can relax more with those jobs — but, I don’t like relaxing on the job! I want progress!

In business, most people think of get rich quick schemes. Others are more realistic, but have exit strategies. Those who think big in business live business. They want to be in business for the rest of their lives — not exit. Exiting is dying! The way most people do business is very boring. They have typical offices, dull employees, and there is nothing that stands out about most companies. To think big and get ahead big, you need to be different and better. You need to think of a way to out do everybody else. Are you thinking this way? I am.

I want to be the best. I want my directory to be the best. I put in much more work into my directory than the other guys do. And we have the traffic to prove that my endless work is paying off. My assistant always asks why I work so hard. She thinks I should take it easy. One reason why I’m not is because she is taking it easy and I have to do work that she could be doing for me. I thought big when I started my site and had a big success. Now, I want to keep that under my belt and do another business with an even bigger success.

What about you? Are you thinking big… enough??? If not, then think harder. Meditate on thinking big and being successful. Success is normally planned. Few have it by accident. And accidental success can easily be taken away from you. I have to go. I have some thinking to do. I hope my room is big enough for how big these thoughts are going to be!

As business people, we can appreciate and learn from the great empires of all time. There were the ancient Hindus, Persians, Greeks, Romans, Muslims, Ottomans, the Spanish, French, and finally the British. The British were famous for their simple yet effective strategy — divide and conquer! As business people, we need to study and learn from the great military minds of the past as their knowledge can sometimes cross-apply to our businesses.

How do you divide and conquer?
The more the world changes, the more it stays the same. Technology keeps changing, but human nature, good writing, and war strategy does not. Analytics provides a way to divide an industry or market into segments. A good marketer understands the different segments and also understands which ones he wants to target for profit. The difference between business and war is that you are not trying to defeat or divide your customers or the market. You are trying to do a siege of someone else’s customers by offering them something better. The dividing part is done by segmenting and using metrics. The conquering part happens when you woo them away from their existing business relationships.

Weakening your competition
If you are a cut throat business person, you will want to weaken your competition. You will want to render their advertising campaigns as useless. You will want to undercut their prices and out-do them on service. If you can cause disloyalty among their troops, all the better. Business is like war. How you play the game is up to you. Many people are quite civilized while others are very brutal and engage in lying, cheating, lawsuits, and more!

Undivide!
If you gradually create very strong bonds with valuable clients and suppliers, you are in a sense undividing yourself which is a key to success. Business is based on connections between people who can help each other, so the better you get at initiating and maintaining strong bonds, the better!